No Day But Today

“There’s only us There’s only this Forget regret, or life is yours to miss No other road No other way No day but today”   - Life Support from Rent

It happened very slowly.  I had lost a lot of weight.  From December of 2005 to May of 2006 I dropped from 210 pounds to 155.  I went from a 40” waist to a 31” waist.  Obviously I had to get all new clothes, but I loved the way I felt.  Big success story, right?

Ric in 2006

Then I slowly started to drop the habits that had helped me get there.  “Wow!”, I thought, “I can go back to eating homemade ice cream and not really gain weight!”.  That was somewhat true, but only if I had a small amount and I kept my exercise routine up.

Next was “Hey!  Even when I miss some exercise, I don’t really gain weight!”.  Again, somewhat true only if I was very strict on my eating and I continued to exercise, even infrequently. But I ignored the caveats, and just let the old habits creep back in to my life.

Reversal of Fortune

Very slowly my weight went up.  It was just a small increase.  And I had lost so much, gaining a little back was no big deal.  I had lost more than my target goal weight, after all. And I had gone through so many trouser sizes on my way down, I just switched from the super-skinny 31” jeans to the 32” inch jeans.  No big deal.

Every increment back up the scale was small and easy to justify or overlook.  Then I got sick, which knocked me off my exercise routine.  I never really got back on it.  Work was stressful and busy, so I just stopped paying attention to what was happening.

Before I knew it, I was up  30 pounds.  Which was very discouraging.  And then, as if everything that I had done up to that point wasn’t bad enough, I just stopped caring.  Which only meant that the pounds kept piling on and on.

So, here I am today.  232 pounds and a 43” waist.  It’s so hard to get motivated to start changing habits.  But what’s clear to me today is that 232 pounds is just a way station on the way to 240 pounds.  If I don’t change things, it will continue to creep up.

Starting here, starting now

But today, I have found a grain of motivation; a small energy source from which to draw to take a step.  And it is this:

Loosing 50 pounds may seem like an impossible dream.  But I can stop the gain and start sending it slowly in the other direction.  That, in and of itself is a powerful victory and milestone for my health. Really, that’s all I have to do.  I think I can mange that.

Of course, health involves so much more than weight issues.  But it is all tied together.  So, here I go.  If you want to follow along, feel free.